How I spent my summer “vacation”

“Oh, it must be so exciting!”

That’s what people say when I tell them I spent my summer in Las Vegas.

“You must use Tower Loan to be able to afford that?!”

That’s what people say when I tell them I have actually spent the majority of the past four summers in Las Vegas.

“Well that explains the money! You must have so much fun!”

That’s what people say after I’ve told them I don’t need a vacation loan because it’s for work.

“Well, it’s better than sitting in a cube.”

Well, probably. I can’t argue that.

Thing is, when I get home, I rarely remember if it was any fun or not.

This summer, I reminded myself to pull out my Blackberry at irregular intervals to help me remember what I did. I went back and reviewed the pictures. I still don’t know. You tell me.

wsop

That was my view for about 95% of the time I was in Las Vegas. That’s from the front row of the press box, looking out over a cess pool of gambling humanity. Every one of those people put up $10,000 to play for millions. Six hundred sixty-six out of 6,844 people at least doubled their money. Only eight of them will make more than $1 million. I sometimes wonder why you would want to sit in such a crowded area when you can do the exact same thing from your sofa at home, on sites like swankybingo.com. Beats me.

swing

That’s two barely dressed women suspended above a pool of gamblers at Rain nightclub at the Palms Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. This place is known for its gambling, so it’s no surprise that so many people came out on this evening to try and make some money. I’m not a massive gambler but I knew I’d have to engage with the gambling at some point as my client is extremely interested in it. Although I did not have much idea about other casino games, I had a vague knowledge about roulette. Knowing that I had to attend the casino with my client, some of my friends suggested me to learn live roulette strategy before embarking on the journey of gambling. They also explained that some of these strategies can also be applied to any live dealer game, including online live casino roulette, and automated roulette. I also got to know that some of the tips might even make me a better player. One of my relatives also told me to practice some online lottery games on websites like The Thaobet. These were indeed some useful advice! My client held a massive open-bar party there. Dita Von Teese, the modern-day queen of burlesque, performed later that night and splashed around in a big glass of water. These women were more impressive and could’ve died if they fell-either from impact or social disease.

stall

I ventured into the bathroom once at that party and saw this sign on the wall. I’m a pretty worldly guy and have seen a lot go on in bathrooms, but I’ve never seen a sign prohibiting it. I wondered when I left who would actually enforce the rule.

racks

That’s what a halfway decent night looks like. It’s not the biggest night I had (think: double), but it’s the one that moved me to take a picture. There are few inanimate objects that get me all riled up. Multiple racks, however, make me rowdy.

And finally…

panther

My buddy Badblood took us to see a parody band called Steel Panther. Normally I like my music pure, acoustic, and fun. This music was a perfect, loud, bastardization of everything you heard in the 1980s. Of the few fun nights I had on this trip, the few hours I spent rolling with the boys that night was the most fun.

And that, Mom, is how I spent my summer “vacation.”

Brad Willis

Brad Willis is a writer based in Greenville, South Carolina. Willis spent a decade as an award-winning broadcast journalist. He has worked as a freelance writer, columnist, and professional blogger since 2005. He has also served as a commentator and guest on a wide variety of television, radio, and internet shows.

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2 Responses

  1. StB says:

    The Panther pic at the end had me laughing out loud. Good to hear you understood the show.

  2. Da Goddess says:

    Eh, it was better than what you’d have had if you’d gone to see my friend Brian. Steel Panther, indeed.