Apart from the part…

[Editor’s note: It looks like Strom will remain in the suspended animation state for a while longer. That gives me a couple of minutes.]

Here’s the thing.

When I was in college, I was a bit of a long-hair for a few years. It grew and grew. I looked worse and worse. Before it was all said and done, a butcher called me “ma’am.”

I cut my hair my junior year in college and have been wearing it basically the same way ever since. Short hair, parted on my left. Box cut in the back, trim it up nice over the ears, and cut those sideburns up about halfway.

I was feeling a little saucy Saturday night. I was taking my wife out for a date. While she was in the shower, I decided to part my hair on the other side. It was a an act of defiance unparalleled in recent memory. I thought I looked completely different, but she didn’t notice at first.

We went out for California rolls and tapanyaki. I spent about 45 minutes attempting to eat every roll they had. California rolls, spring rolls, Vietnamese spring rolls. Even a roll of toilet paper. My face was buried in my plate for so long, I thought she would have a good chance to look at the top of my head. Nothing.

We went to a movie, went home, went to bed. Nothing.

So, for the last four days, I’ve been parting my hair on my right. Nobody has noticed. I’ve hung out with people I’ve known for years (including my wife) for hours at a time. Nothing.

I hate the way I look. I look silly with my hair parted on the right. But I refuse to switch it back until somebody mentions something.

And here’s the parting shot…do people just avoid looking at my hair (are they looking somewhere else?) or am I just so average that moderate changes in my appearance don’t register with people?