Cracking the comments code
This may surprise you, but I know a little more about crack cocaine than the average 37-year-old guy who grew up in a semi-rural community in southwest Missouri. I know how it’s made, how...
Category: Recreation
Dry doc’d
If I sit with you for any amount of time these days, we’ll soon determine whether you’re a documentary person or not. I certainly hold no great prejudice if you prefer to spend your...
Iceman cometh
My dad taught me many things: how to play in the key of G, how to shave, how to eat four pounds of crab legs without throwing up in public. I can’t assign a...
We’re going nowhere
I heard a political speech this weekend. I transcribed the end of it from a recording. If you didn’t hear it, too, I’d suggest you take the time to read through this brief section....
Patience, young grasshopper
The past three weeks have been busier than most for me and it’s not going to slow down much for another six weeks or so. I’m remaining patient. In the meantime, I’m Mr. Mom...
Insurance fraud hail storm
On any given summer day in this fair suburban neighborhood, one could look out over the expanses of manicured fescue and Bermuda and find day laborers napping under giant sweetgums and oaks. They are...
The Dennis DeYoung Dilemma
I’m sitting at a poker table. Or a bar. Or at the gate waiting for a plane. It doesn’t matter, because I ask the same question in all of these places and more. “If...
Margarita shrimp tacos recipe
The kitchen was a little short on supplies this evening when I went in to make dinner. I ended up experimenting a little bit with what I had and came up with this. There...
Brothers
I wish I could remember the exact time my brother became my best friend. It might well have been the moment he was born, but you wouldn’t have known it until much later. Nearly...
Life before Angry Birds
I remember a time I could sit down to a dinnertime pork chop and not think, “Serves you right. You never should’ve thought that helmet would save you.” If I could remember it more...
What happened?
I long ago gave up the idea of chronicling everything that happens to me when I’m in Las Vegas during the World Series of Poker. I burn every candle at both ends and from...
A friend and his pen
Six or seven years ago, I stumbled into the circle of a guy named Pauly. You’ve seen me write a lot about him here. We’ve never lived in the same city, but over the...
World Cup tears
The boy’s lip trembled when it became clear that the USA was going to lose to Ghana. He fought the tears as long as he could and stumbled over his words as he asked...
Greenville News seeks bugle player with “Taps” experience
Classified ad to appear soon in Greenville News: Local newspaper seeks Upstate bugle player, preferably single and good looking, with experience in playing “Taps.” Musician must be able to work pro bono or be...