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Yesterday, somebody I know told me, “One of my friends just sent me an e-mail saying the Greenville Police are now writing tickets, even if you are going less than 5 miles per hour...
Category: Humanity
Adventures in customer service (Part 1)
I like to produce as much as I like to consume. I think it has something to do with my heretofore unstated need for validation and affection. My insurance doesn’t pay for therapy, so...
Double dipping, as explained by Joe Henfield
(Paradise Island, Bahamas) — You have to imagine the thick Bahamian accent and a guy who looks a little like Jim Brown. That’s Joe Henfield, a private limo driver in Nassau. He doesn’t have...
Advice from the most honest one in the room
Norman Rockwell was an idealist, or he lived in a time before hyper-consumerism and ease of travel made the holidays one giant reason to drink. Sweating, honking, cursing people fill the streets and malls...
Deconstructing the deconstructed
I’ve recently been in communication with someone who knows somebody I used to know. Yeah, that’s vague, but I don’t see any reason to further beat somebody while he’s down, so there’s no reason...
Early warning system
My kid cannot keep a secret. I don’t think he even tries. Despite being an exceptionally intelligent child, I’m not sure he grasps the idea of confidence. To him, secrecy means you tell somebody...
Secret handshake
Last night, I met a guy who slings hemp bracelets. That’s not drug code or anything (the drug dealer was a different guy a few seats down the bar). The bracelet guy actually makes...
Going home to a foreign country
(San Jose, Costa Rica)–The Obama victory celebration in San Jose, Costa Rica was small but dedicated. It started with my partners Dave and Joe convincing the bartender to turn the televisions to CNN. It...
Man without an Election Day
(San Jose, Costa Rica)–It’s late in Costa Rica. I’m here to work. I am among a ragtag group of local Ticos, traveling poker players, and lost gringos who gave up on America a long...
Coming home
I’ve been on the road for ten days or so. I just got home and unpacked the car when I realized I’m leaving again in five days for what is essentially two weeks on...
Hypocrisy on the rocks
Note: Not that I feel the real need to bring this up, but just in case, this post is not for your kids’ eyes So, Ice Cube apparently was apparently so moved by the...
Birthday parties are un-American
I am convinced birthday parties for children are part of a Chinese conspiracy. I spent two hours yesterday inside a giant warehouse filled with inflatable jumping platforms and slides. It was a bit like...
…and here’s where it gets confusing
If America weren’t confused enough about the state of the economy, it now is completely lost. The cognitive dissonance is so thick, Michael Phelps is thinking about training in it for 2012. Let’s do...
Post Bail-out Vote Shopping list
I’m not much of a reactionary, but after spending the day in close consultation with people much smarter than me, I’ve built the following shopping list. Bottle water Canned tuna 20 pounds rice 50...