Friday Mental Massage: The last Friday
When I woke up this morning, I put on a live Allman Brothers album, opened all the curtains, and sat in the Carolina sunshine. Everything is green, I wake up every morning in a...
Category: Suburban warrior
Bands of brothers
“Is Carlo dead?” My four year old son son sat wide-eyed and confronted the reality of it all. Carlo, a giant gash in the side of his head, lay in the sand. Flies buzzed...
Friday Mental Massage: Summer’s end edition
Well, summer is almost over. Hot one wasn’t it? Oh, you’re just getting started? I get it. You’re normal. For me, I’m headed off to summer school (read: work in Las Vegas) very soon,...
My phirst time
Trey Anastasio might be the world’s greatest hypnotist. It takes talent to put just one person under a spell. The power of suggestion can sometimes be enough for a stand-up hypnotist to control a...
Frolf body
I rolled over this morning and wished I’d had a mirror nearby. By all indications, I’d been in a car wreck, and I wanted to know how bad it had been. Had my beautiful...
The worst time to blog
I just returned from the grocery store, where–if the royal They is correct–the worst time to go is when you’re hungry. As it happened, I was getting a bit peckish and found myself loading...
Nine years
June 3, 2000 was a steamer. We stood on the Eastern Continental Divide and looked out over North Carolina. We couldn’t deny it was uncomfortably hot. I was dressed in a monkey suit. My...
When 90% is all you get
I had neither shaved nor showered in 48 hours and the doctor who looked like John Grisham was telling me how he was going to stick a two-inch needle into my newborn’s spinal column....
Disconnected
A good friend recently told me, “Your blog sucks.” I took a small amount of umbrage. “It’s stale,” he said. “I demand new content.” I had to agree. I’m in one of those stupid...
I got nothin’
Maybe it’s the odd hours, the new noises, the tweaked schedule, but I really got nothin’. At all.
It’s not for my nipples
“Call me when you leave the gym,” my wife said. “I’m not sure if I’m going to have time to pick up my prescription.” I was listening. I promise. Just not enough to ask...
To my second son
There is a man in our neighborhood who walks his snake. When your mom and I first saw the guy, we thought he was carrying a rope or a white horseshoe draped over his...
New dads are allowed…
…one gratuitous photo gallery post after their kid is born. This is mine. I can’t promise I won’t continue writing on my continued attempts at being a decent dad, but I won’t spam you...
Dos makes it easy
There will be time for something verbose and mushy sometime later this week. For now, just let it be known that the kid known as Dos arrived last night at 10:16pm and weighed in...